Woah! Woah! Woah! Slow down your horses! Now before you concoct something extreme or judge me, I’ll just like to say that this was a dire circumstance. You know, desperate times and all that.
So, did I really go shirtless in a public bus? Yes.
Yes I did, but for less than 3 minutes… I think.
And it was for a good cause, not anything dirty or involving exchange of cash or fluids. This was one of those ‘things you do for medical school’ moments.
Getting right into the story, it was exam week and on one of those wretched nights, I threw an all nighter. Don’t get me wrong, I throw all nighters all the time so an all nighter was not the reason for my predicament. Anyway, by the following morning, I still hadn’t revised EVERYTHING yet. And I just had to. The course was too bulky to risk something like not going through everything at least once. So picture me on my bed looking at my laptop screen with eyes bulging and probably red rimmed like someone on crack, surrounded by a tornado of papers and open books, going as fast as possible and flipping pages every other minute, whilst still keeping my eye on the time at the bottom right of my laptop.
My initial thought process;
‘I can totally do this’
‘I can finish all this stuff’,
‘It’s not so bad if you really look at it, all I’ll have to do is just spend 10mins per PowerPoint presentation and brush through my notes’ which of course then took me about 30mins to finish one presentation.
—————–(about 15 mins to exam time)——————
‘Shit! Shit! Shit! I can’t finish this thing!’
‘What am I gonna do now?!’
‘Maybe they won’t bring this part, I don’t think the lecturer even really likes this topic’
—————–(about 5 mins to exam time)——————-
‘Oh God! Oh God! Oh God! Come and help me!!!’
‘Okay, okay, Eloho calm down. Calm down.’
‘Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!’
‘Okay, I’m almost done’
*looks at time* ‘Shit! I’m late!’
Then a billion ‘shits!’ whilst packing my bag and quickly dressing up.
So fast forward to being on the bus and still rummaging through my notes when I suddenly decided to blindly slip the fare into the front bottom pocket of my scrub and realise there was no pocket.
What do you know? I was wearing the back of the scrubs.’Great!’
So realising that there wouldn’t be time to go to the washroom on campus to change when I finally got to school, I resigned to changing on the bus. Luckily for me, there was only one other guy one row behind me and the conductor two rows in front of me. So first of all, I tried scuttling down so that they wouldn’t see me (I wasn’t wearing a cami inside, just my bra). But of course that didn’t work, so I had to resolve to changing sitting right up. I wasn’t concerned about the guy at the back because the only thing he would obviously see was my back. I was concerned about the driver, the other cars on the road and the conductor turning around to find me in the middle of stripping. I was also scared of any one of them calling the police because I wasn’t sure if I was committing a criminal offence. Anyway, after making sure the conductor was faced forward, I went ahead to attempt completing the remaining stages of my mission.
Stage 2: quickly get my arms out
Stage 3: turn the shirt around and,
The final stage, hallelujah! – slide my arms back in.
I proceeded to go about my business as quickly as possible and successfully completed stage 2 and 3, when I realised the shirt had not only been on the wrong side but also on the flipside. My mind of course proceeded to go on a string of expletives followed by resolve to throw all shyness out the window and just rip the shirt off my head, flip it over to the right side and put it back on. So far the conductor had been facing forward so at least something was going right, or so I thought because just after I slipped the shirt off, the conductor turned his head around. I internally winced whilst plastering a smile on my face that I’m sure looked painful because what else could I have done? I also felt sorry for the guy due to the utter shock and embarrassment on his face, that I’m also sure mirrored mine at that moment. To God be the glory he was one of the decent ones because he quietly turned his head back around with the same look of discomfort on his face whilst I successfully flipped the shirt over and over my head.